3 Ways to Help Leaders Reflect and Refuel

3 Ways to Help Leaders Reflect and Refuel

Leadership, Mindfulness

During the 3 minutes it will take you to read this post, you’ll probably get an email, a text, a Slack message, a missed call, a social media notification, or some combination of all of the above. Let 30 minutes pass, and you could be swimming in unanswered inbounds. A steady diet of requests for your attention – both electronically and in-person – can leave you overwhelmed and intellectually and emotionally undernourished. You cannot lead effectively when your plate is full, but your cup is empty.

You cannot lead effectively when your plate is full, but your cup is empty.

As a leader, you have a responsibility to create a culture of performance. Research shows that your ability to do so will require you to carve out your most precious resource – time – for yourself to reflect. In his March 2013 Harvard Business Review article, JP Morgan Managing Director Chris Lowney suggested that leaders need to take a mental pit stop. As a former Jesuit seminarian, Lowney recalled that St. Ignatias of Loyola, founder of the Jesuits, recommended a practice known as examen. Simply put, it’s the concept of examining your day and taking stock.

Before you move onto your next thing to do, make a commitment to yourself to refuel by practicing the 3 G’s for daily reflection. Find a notebook and select a time and place each day to examen, as follows:

Practice Gratitude. A 2013 survey of 2,000 Americans by the John Templeton Foundation found that people are less likely to feel gratitude about work than anyplace else. In fact, respondents tended to rank their jobs as dead last when asked to list the things they were grateful for. Yet, studies have shown that people who make a habit of recording what they are grateful for have more positive emotions, feel better physically and mentally, and feel more connected to others as a result. What or who at work are you grateful for?

Give Your Reserve. When your tank is low, the last thing you may think about is, “what can I do to help someone else?” But, research confirms that the warm glow you feel after giving someone else a boost can be mapped to neural hedonic activity (aka stimulate pleasure systems in the brain). So, pick up the check for the next person in the drive-thru. Call someone who needs it. Take the neighbor’s garbage cans in. It will brighten their day, and give yourself a lift as well. What little thing could you give today?

Extend Grace. There’s a saying that not forgiving someone is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. Remember when your colleague cut you off in mid-sentence on Zoom when you were trying to make that point about the new project? Drop it. Whether she did it to undermine you or because she was caught up in brainstorming, it’s over. She’s not burning up thinking about it. While you’re at it, give yourself some grace too. If you’re still punishing yourself for a mistake you made with the best of intentions, let it go. Who can you stop keeping score on?

Especially during these unpredictable days, you’re taking in more information than you ever have before. Make time for yourself to reflect and refuel so that you can turn that information into knowledge, and that knowledge into insight.

Question: What do you do when your plate is full but your cup is empty?

 

 

Driven by the premise that excellence is the result of aligning people, purpose and performance, Center for Executive Excellence facilitates training in leading self, leading teams and leading organizations. To learn more, subscribe to receive CEE News!

Surviving a Negative 360 Degree Leadership Review

Surviving a Negative 360 Degree Leadership Review

360 Degree Feedback, Leadership

It’s been said that feedback is the breakfast of champions. For many people, however, that feedback can go down like a bowl of cold, lumpy oatmeal.

In my work as a leadership consultant, clients often tell me that they would welcome 360 degree feedback on their performance. 360 feedback is a process where not just the manager, but peers and direct reports and sometimes even customers, evaluate someone’s performance. The person being reviewed – typically, someone in a leadership position – receives an analysis of how he or she perceives themselves as leaders and how others perceive them. That analysis is used to find opportunities to close the gaps in perception, and improve performance.

Sounds simple enough. Yet, no matter how much my clients think that they would welcome constructive criticism, the initial results can feel like feedback by firing squad. Especially when they get it from multiple raters in a 360 degree review format.

In reality, most people process negative feedback by working through the five stages of grief. They react with the denial stage and try to cling to their preferred reality. Next, they move to anger and look for someone else to blame. In the bargaining stage, they consider ways to negotiate ways out of doing the work to assess reality correctly. This often leads to the stage of depression and withdrawal. In the final stage, acceptance, they recognize that there may be some truth to the feedback, and resolve to deal with it.

This cycle is partly because leaders tend to have attribution bias. That is, we take too much credit for our successes and assign too much external blame for our failures. It’s a survival mechanism that helps to protect our self-esteem. Unfortunately, it also prevents learning and growth.

If you suffer a setback from negative feedback, you don’t have to get stuck in the grief cycle:

  • Re-read the feedback carefully and mine it for nuggets to help you critically evaluate where you can improve.
  • Talk with others who you trust to get their perspective on your feedback.
  • Use this opportunity to do some serious discovery work, then act with renewed conviction.
  • Move out of the grief cycle and onto a path that will allow you to grow as a leader and be the kind of model you strive to be.

Getting negative feedback about your performance from your colleagues can be an ego bruiser. But, successful leaders know that feedback can shed light on their blind spots, and help them assess reality correctly. Every setback can become a springboard to a comeback if you respond in the right way.

Question: How do you use feedback to grow yourself as a leader?

 

If you aren’t aware of the impact you have on others as a leader, how will you know where to adjust? We partner with Truscore to provide validated and customizable 360 feedback evaluations for leaders at all levels. Truscore 360’s measure you against predefined leadership competencies and give you both quantitative and qualitative data to help you make high impact changes that sharpen your emotional intelligence. Learn more and sign up with one of our coaches today.

 

Driven by the premise that excellence is the result of aligning people, purpose and performance, Center for Executive Excellence facilitates training in leading self, leading teams and leading organizations. To learn more, subscribe to receive CEE News!

Beyond the Basics: 2 Events to Help You Bridge the Inclusion Gap

Beyond the Basics: 2 Events to Help You Bridge the Inclusion Gap

Leadership, People

Gay men are naturally fashionable. Black men are the best athletes. Asians are the model minority.

These are just three examples of positive stereotypes, or subjectively favorable beliefs about certain social groups. And, just as negative stereotypes can be harmfully inaccurate, so too, can positive stereotypes. The trope about Asians being the model minority, for example, largely stems from the idea that Asian Americans have achieved socio-economic mobility through superior education. The problem with this positive stereotype is that it undermines the Asian American and Pacific Islander AAPI community as a monolithic group protected from systemic racism in America. The inconvenient truth, however, is that the AAPI community faces discrimination and persecution while society falsely insists they are protected.

CBS News recently reported, for example, that in 2020, the New York Police Department had recorded an 867% increase in anti-Asian hate crimes compared to 2019. And, when Donald Trump repeatedly and unapologetically described COVID-19 as “the China virus” in March 2020, the US’s Stop AAPI Hate coalition recorded more than 650 incidents of discrimination in just one week.

The fallout of COVID-19 and racism continue to expose America’s ugly roots, and the work we must continue to do to be better. Center for Executive Excellence stands in solidarity with the AAPI community, and we are offering our platform as a space for leaders to learn about how to create safer, more equitable workplaces for everyone.

Please join us on April 28th for the panel discussion, DEI In Action: A Conversation with Practitioners and Leaders, followed by a half-day Re:Imagine Leadership Summit: Bridging the Inclusion Gap through Transformative Leadership. The panel includes DEI practitioners Samira Salem, Vice President, Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion, CUNA, Armond Kinsey, Vice President and Chief Diversity Officer, Atlantic Health System, Monica Davy, SVP and Chief Culture Diversity and Inclusion Officer, Vizient, Inc., Sarah Hassaine, Global Director of Diversity, ResMed, Markus Achord, Head of Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging, Sunrun, and will be moderated by Arthur Benjamin, Senior Director, Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion, Tinuiti.

Former NFL running back Terrell Fletcher will open the Re:Imagine Leadership Summit on April 29th, Sarah Hassaine and I will facilitate workshops on bias in the workplace, and our Scholar-in-Residence Dr. Tony Baron will close the Summit with a keynote on bridging the inclusion gap through Transformative Leadership. You can find more information about these events here.

We know that it will take much more than words to alleviate the pain. But, we also know that organizational leaders play a key role in driving positive change, and we will continue to commit ourselves to use our platform, power, and privilege to create a better, more just world for everyone.

Question: What role will you play in driving positive change when it comes to diversity, equity and inclusion?

Driven by the premise that excellence is the result of aligning people, purpose and performance, Center for Executive Excellence facilitates training in leading self, leading teams and leading organizations. To learn more, subscribe to receive CEE News!

Tammy Duckworth is One Tough Mother

Tammy Duckworth is One Tough Mother

Leadership, People

When you picture a U.S. Army National Guard helicopter pilot who lost both legs in battle, you probably don’t think of an Asian woman. But, then, nothing about Tammy Duckworth’s story fits into the baseball, hotdogs, apple pie Americana tropes that we’ve come to think of as normal.

In her memoir being released today, Every Day Is a Gift, Duckworth takes readers through the amazing—and amazingly true—stories from her incomparable life. In November of 2004, an Iraqi rocket-propelled grenade (RPG) blew through the cockpit of Tammy Duckworth’s U.S. Army Black Hawk helicopter. The explosion, which destroyed her legs and mangled her right arm, was a turning point in her life. But as Duckworth shows in Every Day Is a Gift, that moment was just one in a lifetime of extraordinary turns.

The biracial daughter of an American father and a Thai-Chinese mother, Duckworth faced discrimination, poverty, and the horrors of war—all before the age of 16. As a child, she dodged bullets as her family fled war-torn Phnom Penh. As a teenager, she sold roses by the side of the road to save her family from hunger and homelessness in Hawaii. Through these experiences, she developed a fierce resilience that would prove invaluable in the years to come.

Duckworth joined the Army, becoming one of a handful of female helicopter pilots at the start of Operation Iraqi Freedom. She served eight months in Iraq before an insurgent’s RPG shot down her helicopter, an attack that took her legs—and nearly took her life. She then spent thirteen months recovering at Walter Reed, learning to walk again on prosthetic legs and planning her return to the cockpit. But Duckworth found a new mission after meeting her state’s senators, Barack Obama and Dick Durbin. After winning two terms as a U.S. Representative, she won election to the U.S. Senate in 2016. And she and her husband Bryan fulfilled another dream when she gave birth to two daughters, becoming the first sitting senator to give birth.

From childhood to motherhood and beyond, Every Day Is a Gift is the remarkable story of one of America’s most dedicated public servants and one tough mother.

As Women’s History Month 2021 comes to a close and Asian Americans are speaking up about being treated as if they are less than American, Senator Duckworth reminds us that healing is always possible, and that the lowest moments can lead to the greatest heights.

 Question: What barrier breakers have caused you to re-shape your definition of “normal” recently?

Driven by the premise that excellence is the result of aligning people, purpose and performance, Center for Executive Excellence facilitates training in leading self, leading teams and leading organizations. To learn more, subscribe to receive CEE News!

5 Takeaways from the 2021 San Diego Women’s Week Leadership Conference

5 Takeaways from the 2021 San Diego Women’s Week Leadership Conference

Leadership, People

Last week, I attended the virtual Women’s Week Leadership Conference sponsored by the North San Diego Business Chamber. This annual conference is designed to inspire, empower and connect women of all ages and professions in honor of Women’s History Month.

Over the weekend, I reviewed my notes and selected a few takeaways that resonated with me.

1. Tammie Jo Shults is a retired American commercial airline captain, author, and one of the first female fighter pilots to serve in the U.S. Navy. She’s also the Southwest Airlines pilot who captained the crippled Southwest 1380 flight in April of 2018, which made an emergency landing after an engine failure and rapid depressurization. After a harrowing emergency descent from 32,000 feet, with one passenger blown partly out of the plane, Captain Shults landed the crippled Boeing 737 in Philadelphia. She retired from Southwest Airlines in 2020.

Quote: A hero is someone who takes the time to see then chooses to act on behalf of somebody else.

Bonus: Shults’ book, Nerves of Steel: How I Followed My Dreams, Earned My Wings, and Faced My Greatest Challenge, is the captivating true story of her remarkable life starting with growing up the daughter of a humble rancher in a small Texas town.

 

2. Andrew Bolwell is the Chief Disrupter and Global Head of HP Tech Strategy and Ventures, the corporate venture arm of HP, where he and his team identify promising, leading-edge technology startups and pursue strategic investments and partnerships to help those companies bring products to market and scale as they grow.

 Quote: Only 35% of Americans think about their 5-year future on a regular basis. Writing a future press release is a great way to make a bold vision come to life.

(Check out Jim Collins tools for creating a vision framework, including tips for writing an article that you’d like to see published 15 years from now.)

Bonus: Bolwell recommends Guy Kawasaki’s The Art of Innovation talk at TEDxBerkeley 2014 which focuses on making meaning, not just money. He stresses that if you determine how you change the world, the success and money will follow. As Kawasaki says, “if you truly want to make meaning, it’s the first step toward innovation.”

 

3. Dr. Alessandra Wall is a clinical psychologist, leadership and confidence coach for professional women, consultant, and accountability partner for leaders who truly care to elevate and support women. Dr. Wall has focused her career on helping women speak up, show up powerfully, and succeed on their own terms.

Quote: The woman who’s most likely holding you back isn’t someone competing with you for a promotion, your toxic boss, or a colleague focused on sabotaging your success. It’s most likely you. Your belief systems, or filters, about the expectations imposed on women limit your power to challenge the status quo, reshape the norm, and create a more equitable society.

Bonus: Check out Dr. Wall’s signature DIY resource, the e-book Back To Me, a 4-week self-care program that covers four major areas of life and where you might be going wrong in each area.

 

4. Luvvie Ajayi Jones is a professional troublemaker. She’s also an author, a sought-after speaker and podcast host who thrives at the intersection of comedy, technology and justice. She is the author of the New York Times bestseller, I’m Judging You: The Do-Better Manual, and just released her second book, Professional Troublemaker: The Fear-Fighter Manual.

Quote: Fear is not something you conquer once and you’re done. Every single day we are met with moments where we can choose courage over fear. In fact, courage doesn’t exist without fear first. If it was easy, then it wasn’t courageous.

Bonus: Watch Ms. Jones’ 2017 TED Talk, Get Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable, that’s had over 5.7 million views (though she nearly skipped doing it because of imposter syndrome).

 

5. Shellye Archambeau is one of high tech’s first female African American executives. She is an experienced CEO and Board Director with a track record of building brands, high performance teams, and organizations. Ms. Archambeau currently serves on the boards of Verizon, Nordstrom, Roper Technologies, and Okta. She is also a strategic advisor to the Royal Bank of Canada, Capital Markets Group.

Quote: Ambition simply means that you have something that you are striving to create, to impact, or to achieve in the future, and you’re working toward it. It’s not using elbows, stepping over others, and taking all of the credit. That has nothing to do with ambition. That’s just rude.

Bonus: Get Ms. Archambeau’s book, Unapologetically Ambitious: Take Risks, Break Barriers, and Create Success on Your Own Terms, full of empowering wisdom and practical tools for how to achieve your personal and professional goals.

These are just a few of the speakers and panelists who generously shared with humor, compassion, power, and grit.

Question: If you attended an event honoring Women’s History Month this year, what messages resonated with you?

-Sheri Nasim, President & CEO

3 Reasons Why I Haven’t Written List Blogs Lately

3 Reasons Why I Haven’t Written List Blogs Lately

Leadership

Our VP of Client Engagement prepares quarterly reports on the impact of our marketing efforts. She starts with an At A Glance summary of our website performance, email subscriptions, and social media impact. Next, she drills down into each category to compare quarter-over-quarter growth and what content gained the most impact and why. She wraps the reports up with recommendations about what we should start, continue, and stop doing. One of the recommendations she made while reviewing the Q4 2020 report was to write more posts of lists, such as the wildly popular “13 Rules of Leadership by Colin Powell”.

Her reasoning was perfectly valid. Lists bring order to chaos. They help us better recall content. They’re easy to scan and less taxing on the brain. “Plus,” she added, “Google’s algorithms promote lists, and that makes it more likely that your posts will be promoted by Google.” I have mad respect for my colleague, but as I reflected on her feedback, I thought about why I’d been writing more reflective posts recently. Here’s my attempt to come up with three reasons why I haven’t written more list posts lately.

1. Lists limit nuance. During a time sharply divided by ideology, it is easier to embrace absolutes over nuances. But absolutes like lists feed into our divided ideology, and I don’t want to contribute to that division right now. Instead, I want to invite differences of opinion, differences in experience, and differences in views to work to heal our divisions.

2. Lists signal conclusion. We’re still in the midst of a period that has stress tested everything we once took as immutable. Our branches of government, security forces, medical and education systems, socio-economic disparity, racial inequity, even the weather patterns are so much more complicated today. We need to keep these issues open and deal with them honestly rather than wait for the inconvenient truths to blow over.

I don’t actually have a third reason or a tidy ending. I would typically write something like “I invite you to take advantage of 2021 with me to appreciate the nuance, invite opposing points of view, and be open to gaining new insight.” While that’s true, I’d prefer to try to leave this here and walk away without the need to oversimplify the beautifully complex state that we are in.

Question: How long can you stay comfortable when life is open-ended?

Driven by the premise that excellence is the result of aligning people, purpose and performance, Center for Executive Excellence facilitates training in leading self, leading teams and leading organizations. To learn more, subscribe to receive CEE News!